I should also mention that for the last 15/20 minutes before his feed, my husband plays some music and sways him. He gets sleepy and often closes his eyes. We make sure he doesn’t completely fall asleep. We have done this since he’s been about a month old. It’s just seems to calm him to set him up for a nice sleep. I don’t know if this is causing a problem, because maybe I’m feeding him and it’s waking him up again.
ReplyAlyssa Taft on July 12, 2022 at 12:50 am
Hello Katie,
Thank you so much for taking the time to post! It is great that your 3 month old is sleeping so well during the day!
This guide outlines some amazing day and night time recommendations. An 8:00PM bedtime is reasonable for a 3 month old. You can then expect your LO to sleep between 9-11 hours at night, with many sleeping 10 hours. If this is the case, I would consider between 8pm-6am as bedtime and make sure your LO is sleeping in the crib in a blackout room with white noise. During the daytime, keep aiming for 2.5-4 hours of day sleep. You want to make sure your LO is well rested during the day because being overtired can lead to more struggles at bedtime.
Once your LO is 5 months of age, then he will be able to learn how to fall asleep independently at bedtime and you will see this really helps prevent any false starts at bedtime.
If you do have any more questions, definitely check out our private consultations! I offer 45 minute Zoom calls and we can discuss your LO’s current schedule and environment and I can provide tips to help improve sleep now 🙂
Best,
Alyssa, BSMS Support Team
Winny on April 10, 2022 at 6:08 pm
Hi my LO will be 3 month old tomorrow. I usually wake her up on 7.30 am then follow her sleep cues (yawning) which usually happen 75 mins after waking from naps. She usually have long morning nap between 1 hr 45 mins to 2 hours. Last nap varies between somewhere between 6.00-7.00 pm (30-45 minutes long). She usually able to stay awake around 1 hour 40 mins to 1 hour 50 mins before bedtime (usually between 8.30-9.00 pm). It usually easy to put her to sleep for naps and beftime. I swaddle her, turn on white noise and turn off light. She will fuss for less than 5 mins and sleep. However she always wake up 30 mins after the bedtime. I will nurse her then rock her to drowsy and lay her down again. These whole process usually take around 30-40 mins. She will then asleep around 9.40-10.10 pm until around 5/6 for feeding then continue to sleep until I wake her up on 7.30. Is this normal for 3 month old, or did I have bedtime false start? Usually even after limiting her nap to around 4-4.5 hrs in total, she still have this wake up 30 mins after bedtime. Would love to hear any suggestion. Thank you
ReplyBecca Fuentes on August 14, 2021 at 1:19 am
Hey Heather! I love how detailed you are already on knowing her schedule and getting her started on good sleep routines! That’s so great! So she is only 3 months old so she isn’t quite developmentally ready for much sleep training but there are some things that you can do to help her sleep better and longer. If she is going to bed at 7pm then the best you can hope for in terms of night sleep is 6am. 3 month olds only need 9-11 hours of night time sleep. She might be a 9 hour baby. We typically recommend a 3 month old having a bedtime sometime between 7:30pm and 9:30pm so 7 is a little early. If you are wanting her to wake up later then I would move her bedtime back. As for naps, the number of naps doesn’t matter as much as the awake time in between so just continue to put her to nap every 1-2 hours when she acts sleepy and then give 1-2 hours between her last nap and her approximate bedtime. So start by moving her bedtime to 7:30 (2 hours after she wakes from her last nap), then adjust her daily napping as she adjusts her wake up time slowly scooting it back as you are able until you get a desirable wake up time. You can also check out our Exhausted Mom Starter Kit for more tips and tricks to getting your baby sleeping more peacefully: //www.babysleepmadesimple.com/how-to-improve-baby-sleep and when she gets closer to 5 or 6 months and you are ready for sleep training please check out our 21 Days to Peace and Quiet Program: //www.babysleepmadesimple.com/21-days-to-peace-quiet-program/ Hope this helps! Becca, BSMS Support Team
ReplyAlyssa Taft on August 7, 2021 at 3:02 pm
Hello Melissa,
The “fourth trimester” can be very challenging! The best things to do at this age (until your LO is ready for sleep training at 5 months) is to start a peaceful bedtime routine and follow age appropriate awake times for naps to keep your LO rested. You always want to aim for your LO to be asleep by the awake time, so start to prepare her for sleep 15 minutes beforehand. It is totally okay to assist your LO with falling back asleep right now until she is able to self-soothe, but I would aim for having her fall asleep and then put her back in the crib since this is the safest sleep space. Hang in there Mama! It WILL get better soon 🙂
Best,
Alyssa, BSMS Support Team
Hang in the
ReplyMarie Pierman on March 24, 2021 at 8:07 pm
I have a question about bedtime. My baby is 3 months old. He usually naps a total of about 5 hours during the day. I try to finish his last nap by 6pm. By 730 we are doing our bedtime routine,feed, and then he is asleep by 745 or 8pm. However, he consistently wakes an hour later, screaming, and hungry. I have tried making bedtime later, but then he gets over tired and super cranky before bed. I’ve tried cluster feeding before bed to try to get him really full but he loses interest. He seems to be treating bedtime like a nap even though the environment is totally different. After this brief wakeup he will usually sleep 3.5 to 4 hours, and will wake to feed 2 other times. Any advise on the bedtime situation? Did he need less naps? I feel like something is off for him to wake up like that.
Thanks!
Svenja on January 8, 2021 at 10:24 pm
Hello! I’ve got a question about settling at bedtime. My baby usually goes to sleep without any extra help during the day in her moses basket. I feed her, swaddle her, rock her a bit to signal nap time and put her down awake. She usually falls asleep like this no problem. But in the evening it’s a whole different story. I do the same routine, except for an extra feed just before bed, but she just won’t settle. I put her down between 7.30 and 8.00 pm but it takes until 8.30/9.00 pm until she’s finally settled with me and my husband taking turns rocking, bouncing, singing etc. She then sleeps through the night which is amazing but we can’t put our finger on what’s the problem with bedtime. It almost seems like she’s not ready to go to sleep before 9pm. Do we have to move bedtime back and add another nap? She naps 4 times during the day with an awake time of 75-90 minutes between naps.
Thank you!
Alyssa Taft on January 9, 2021 at 9:30 pm
Hello Svenja,
Thank you for your message. Believe it or not, babies use different sides of the brain to operate day and night sleep. I remember I was shocked when I learned this, but then it made sense how my daughter did better with naps vs. night sleep. Try to make sure you follow the 90 minutes of awake time before bed. So try to have her down at the 90 minute mark (asleep). This means you should try to settle her to sleep about 10-15 minutes prior to when you want her to be asleep. Continue to have a peaceful nightly ritual. Adding in at tub can help signal that it is bedtime. Bedtimes after often later (around 8:30pm) for a 3 month old. I would recommend signing up for our FREE Exhausted Mom’s Survival Kit for helpful tips!
//www.babysleepmadesimple.com/exhausted-moms-survival-kit
Best,
Alyssa, BSMS Support Team
Alyssa Taft on January 30, 2021 at 9:40 pm
Hello Gu!
So awake windows really mean the maximum amount of time that your LO can be awake for. There is a range because every baby is so different. Babies can handle less awake time in the morning, but more as the day goes on. So for example, after your 3 month old wakes up in the morning, she may need to be asleep by the 1 hour mark. Then for the next nap, she may be able to handle 1 hour and 10 minutes, and so on. You want your baby ASLEEP by that time, so you will want to start getting your LO ready for a nap 15 minutes prior to the sleep time. If your LO is crying and screaming and having a hard time going down for a nap, this is usually a big clue that your LO is overtired and you missed that sleepy window. I recommend keeping a little log and figuring out your awake times to see what works best. My 3 month old could never hit 2 hours of awake time before bed. It was always closer to 1 hour and 30 minutes max. Every baby is different so you just need to figure out what works best for your LO!
Best,
Alyssa, BSMS Support Team
Jennifer Mejia on May 21, 2020 at 5:54 pm
Hi Jilly I really need you help.
My son is 3 months old his bedtime is between 8 and 830 and we both get up for the day at 8.
He nurses at 2am for the first feed and after that all hell breaks loose. He wakes every hour to be re settled to sleep. Sometimes I rock the bassinet, pick him up and pay his back, or simply reinsert the pacifier and worry that he goes to sleep. He often wakes at 330, I gave him his pacifier and try to push the second feeding until 4 to nurse again, then he wakes again at 5 to 530. He wakes up crying with his eyes closed just wanting to go back to sleep and seems like he can’t . Then again at 630 (at this point I feed him again. But then he wakes again and again at 730. Today was the first time that at 5:30 he was just wide awake. He wasn’t crying this time so I let him lay there to see if he would fall back asleep but instead he was just putting his swaddle in his mouth. He started escaping from his Velcro swaddle and I am afraid to illuminate it cold turkey because his hands really do distract him from sleeping. He laid there for about 25 minutes until eventually I nursed him at 6 AM. He immediately fell back asleep and woke up at 7:30. But of course crying and no seeming to wake up for the day.
During the day he will really only nap on average 35 minutes at a time . I’m lucky if it’s over 40 minutes.
I’m very careful about not keeping him awake too long he really cannot be awake more than an hour and 10 minutes without being overtired. I woke upstairs to his bedroom before every nap after being up for 50 minutes. Last two nights he is really fighting me on his very last nap which is usually around 630 and last until seven. The snap is usually essential because his bedtime is 8 to 830 and he really can’t stay awake from 530 until eight without being hysterical. But last night he fought me for over 45 minutes straight from 635 till 720 until I finally gave up and sobbed. He did not end up taking this last nap. Instead my husband picked him up and started to get his bath ready for the bedtime routine. And instead of waking up at 2 AM for his first feed he woke up at 12 I resettled him back to sleep but he woke up again at 12:30 and once again I resettled him back to sleep until two.
I’m so desperate Jilly, i’m depressed and incredibly exhausted. His nap space in his room is dark but not pitch black, he has a sound machine and I swaddle him with the halo sleep sack (arms down but he all most always escapes from it)
What do I do and how do I get him to stop waking up every hour after 4 AM. I’m snapping at my oldest son, it’s effecting my marriage, I cry every single day and I have no family living nearby. I’m trying to teach him to fall asleep on his own by letting him in his crib drowsy but it does not always work. Is the pacifier the problem? Is it me? Is it the naps?
panagiota on May 22, 2020 at 10:15 am
Hi there Jeniffer.
First of all, know that you’re a great mom and you’re definitely not the problem. Try to stay calm, though I know it’s very hard sometimes, especially if you’re struggling, you’re exhausted and have little help. I know, cause I’ve been there and it was really hard. But things WILL get better, I promise.
I believe you’ve already read our 3 month old sleep guides, so you know that sleep can be very unpredictable at this age. If you don’t know where to start with helping your LO sleep better I would suggest you join our free Exhausted Mom’s Survival Kit that’s filled with tips on how to get your baby sleep longer stretches. Here’s the link –> //www.babysleepmadesimple.com/exhausted-moms-survival-kit
Please try implementing these tips for a few days and let us know how things work out. Panagiota, BSMS Support Team
ReplyPam M on May 4, 2020 at 11:11 am
Hi Jilly, my baby is 13 weeks old and used to sleep well at night, waking every 2-2.5 hours for feeds at night. For the last 2 weeks or so, he sleeps for 2-3 hourd for the first stretch and then is waking every hour in the night crying and often sicking up, and then needs a feed to go back to sleep. We have tried to settle him without nursing him but he will scream until he has milk. He sleeps 8:30-9:00pm and wakes around 6:30am
It seems like he is trying to turn over. Is close to it in the day when on his play gym and also at night, and at least once in the night turns himself so he is lying completely horizontally! He was in a co-sleeper crib and two nights ago we swapped it for a cot next to us so he had more room. We follow your bedtime routine and we watch his awake times which are between 1-2 hours. He doesn’t nap in his bedroom his morning naps is his longest and he sleeps on my husband in the living room so I can catch up on sleep. His other naps are a combination of sleeping on us or in the bassinet. They are about 30 mins. He falls asleep when we bounce/pat him to sleep (without feeding he feeds when he wakes up). He will not sleep if we put him down drowsy.